how to completely lose your sanity in 10 easy steps

i made a cake this week ....for the talent display at the ss practical.

anything remarkable in this??????usually i'd say no....i like baking,and i've made cakes before.
that day,however,just wasn't my day. and that,is an understatement. here is the recipe for complete mayhem, loss of control, laugh-in-the-face-of-stupidity chaos.

prerequisites:: an overly helpful mom(actually,any mom) who can only be contacted by phone, a culinarily-challenged dad.

step i-i get the butter from g. dairy farm.big mistake.its old and reeks with an unpleasant smell ,that,oddly enough,i didn't smell when i bought it. the butter actually turned liquid when i applied the beater!
and now my cake smells too.[:(]

step ii-my beater breaks between the second and third egg.no description needed for this one.i made the rest of the cake with the blender(after i called mom and she told me to!!!).hehehe.

step iii-by this time i was freakishly hysterical,and at that precise moment,mom calls.she found out the whole thing,and tries to give me some tips,none of which were helpful.end of the call....

step iv-mom calls again.i snivel into the phone.she insists on talking to dad,and i call him.turns out he's in the bathroom,and can't come immediately....tell mom....she thinks i have my i- can-do-anything-and-don't-you-dare-mess-with-me-i'll-handle-it fit on and insists on talking to him immediately.i go up in hopes that dad will take the phone.he doesn't.so i tell her (again)that he's in the loo.she doesn 't believe me.she yells at me.i call dad again.he yells at me.mom hears it over the phone and is (finally!) convinced.i put down her phone and tell dad to call her.phew!!!i go down.

step v-dad comes down to talk to her.i had dismantled the beater earlier,in hopes of fixing it,and the remains were left on the kitchen platform.dad takes one glance at them,assumes that i dropped the beater and tells mom that fairy tale.confusion prevails.

step vi-i get the phone from dad...(snatch actually) and tell mom what actually happened....more like yell actually...not sure she's convinced though.

step vii-in the middle of this dad suddenly declares that he'll help me,grabs hold of the blender and starts to rotate it......THE OTHER WAY ROUND!!!!!

step viii-i notice this,and lose any self control i might have had-and yell into the phone-he's doing it the other way round!!!!HE'S DOING IT THE OTHER WAY ROUND!!!-mom promptly drops the phone.

step ix-dad's still beating it.

step x- i whirl dad around and ask him just what exactly does he think he's doing......dad blinks and in the same tone asks me ata kay???(what now???)i start yelling at him and then,at the crux of the tension,the phone rings. its your friendly neighbourhood mom.(we're saved....or maybe NOT)



then i can't remember what i did next...its all a blur....but i think i calmed down,told mom not to call again,told dad to back off,took charge of the cake finished it and put it in the oven.
dad tried to grease the pan.....it was hilarious....do all beginners try to do it with a tiny little spoon???

in any case,the cake was an absolute mess....i'm doing one again on tuesday.....under mom's supervision and i won't let dad anywhere near this one before it's completely made.

and oh yeah.....i bunked the ss practical.....which is a pity....coz i think the others had fun.....but then i guess after the night before,i simply didn't have the energy.;)

and i did learn something from this,i could tell you but i forgot.